Tuesday, November 19, 2013



     Some times in life we are faced with challenges that can take us out of character. We face everyday challenges that often cause us to succumb to negative vibes. These negative vibes usually take over our lives, leading to destructive behavior. Often this negative behavior can feel right and cause us to continue making poor decisions. At some point the negative behavior take such a toll on your life that things began to spiral out of control and you began to lash out further. At this point you can choose to surrender to this behavior or you can began your healing process and start living peaceful again. I'm going to tell you a little about how I started my journey to become a more positive person and what lead me to my breaking point.

     In December 2009 my mother suffered several strokes which caused her to lose the ability to move or speak. It was quick and unexpected. Shortly before that I had lost my job and was on the verge of losing my home and relationship. I went from being a happy and vibrant women, to hurting emotionally, financially and praying for my mothers life daily. Each morning that God blessed me with, I wanted to lay down and go back to sleep. I had to juggle stressing over bills, saving my relationship, taking care of my children and making some really tough decisions concerning my mothers life. In May of 2010 my siblings and I decided to sign a DO NOT RESUSCITATE order for my mother. This decision was painful and extremely hard to make. It was also a decision that I hurt over up til this day. I completely shut myself off from my family and spent most of my days pitying myself. On July 31, 2010 my mother, my best friend and protector passed away. Shortly after that I lost my home and my 8 year relationship with my boyfriend was over.  I began to act out because of the tremendous pain I was in. I was not myself and I truly needed to be saved from all the pain I was feeling. The problem was, I was looking for the wrong things, people and places to save me. Although I took myself through some unnecessary heartache I don't regret it because I learned some great lessons. The reason I'm sharing some of my heartaches and pains with you is to show you that you are not alone. Everyone go through some form or hurt pain and defeat. The great news is that I'm going to share 7 steps that helped me regain my inner peace.

     In July 2013 I decided I want to live a happy and peaceful life. I decided that I would no longer allow negative things, people, places, words or attitudes affect my life. I will dismiss anything I feel is not a positive addition to my life. I decided to live a HAPPY life and rid myself of all things the did not contribute to my new journey. In order to do that I had remove anything I deemed negative and replace it with ALL things positive.

#7 READING: Start reading books on being positive. Choose books that inspire you and feed your mind. Reading a good book will help distract you from all the negative energy around you. It allows you to have some quiet time and help you relax. Find a comfortable space and cuddle up with a good book.

#6 WRITING: When you are stressed find a calm and peaceful place to sit with your pen and pad. Spontaneously began to write whatever comes to mind. Relax and allow all the hurt and pain to be release on the paper in front of you. By doing this you allow yourself to unleash all that bottled up anger.

#5 MUSIC: Music has always been a great way to change your mood. Make a playlist of music that make you happy. The playlist can consist of calm soothing music, much that make you smile or music that make you dance. Whatever you decide to put in your playlist, be sure that it change your mood to a good one.

#4 STOP WORRYING: Worrying will not change your situation. Actually, worrying will harm you more than help you. Worrying can interfere with your appetite, life style habits, job performance, sleep and relationship. Instead of worrying, began to think of solutions that may help you with your situation. If you can not find a solution continue to stay positive and do not allow the negative thinking to enter you space.

#3 YOGA: Emotional stress of daily life often contribute to physically stress like muscle tension and constricted breathing. Yoga help reduce stress by encouraging you to take deep, rhythimic breaths. It also increase the flow of blood and oxygen in your body allowing you to feel relaxed and calm.

#2 MEDITATE: Much like yoga, the deep slow breathing technique helps to reduce stress. I usually breath in on a ten count and breath out on a ten count. While breathing, clear your mind and began to think or speak positive words such as peace, love, humble, etc.....

#1 FORGIVING: This one is tough. It's not always easy to forgive someone who hurt you or forgive yourself for hurting someone. Carrying around pain and hurt will only harm you. You should forgive those who hurt you because if you hold onto that pain you are allowing that person to have too much power over your life. If you don't forgive yourself your are allowing your emotions to control your life. Release yourself by way of forgiveness and you will be a much happier person.

I hope these tips helped you the same way that they helped me. Don't allow your life to be overcome by negative the energy of people, places, emotions and things. If you find these tips helpful let me know by commenting below. If you have some tips to add to this list feel free to share.